Thursday, November 02, 2006

Semi-liveblogging the OC - SPOILERS

Does it count as liveblogging if you watch it on tivo?

I have decided to leave this window open as I watch the first episode of the OC - season four! Already the emo music is starting. Where do they find these sets in Orange County? Nothing looks like that - that looks like a blown out Les Mis blockader or something, not a freaking one-bedroom studio in Long Beach or wherever they think Ryan is spending his time now.

I love how Ryan is already the new Marissa. Like he wasn't annoyingly self-defeating before. Also is that a freaking Jeep? When did he get that? Ooh Julie Cooper is not looking hot. Go makeup artists!

Ok so far I have seen every minute of this episode in a preview. I AM NOT IMPRESSED YET!

Question - should I buy season 3 of the OC on dvd, just because I already have the first two, even though it totally sucks? Answer: TBD.

Wow, 36 hours earlier... that's way Memento/Seinfeld episode in India of you. I HAVE ALSO ALREADY SEEN THIS ON A PREVIEW COME ON JOSH SCHWARTZ DO NOT LET ME DOWN. Luke's twin brothers do not look like twins.

So glad Taylor Townsend is a real character. STILL HAVEN'T SEEN ANYTHING NEW. Oh yeah cause that is totally the way college is - even at Brown they are not like that. Summer I do not buy this for a second. Okay, finally some new scenes that I didn't watch on YouTube back in September. Did Kirsten take a drink? I can't remember what happened last season except that Taylor was there, Caitlin was there, Marissa died, and Julie Cooper married another rich man. Jesus she is sawing bushes. I think I've seen this scene before too. Way to call her daughter dying and her being upset about it an "unspeakable grief" like it's nothing. Yes, I saw this scene too. Most of it. Caitlin is looking kind of foxy, her hair is different. Nice skull chain but ugly halter top, very 2005. Also where did Ryan find a mattress that springy, even Craigslist has better beds than that. Ryan is looking quite tan.

Is that what Brown looks like? I like Summer's sweater. This new college activist guy reminds me of someone straight out of Felicity. Ooh, I am excited, Summer is totally a different person without Marissa. She is already seeming different. Shocking that Taylor is not what she seems... everyone has to have inner angst. Ah, Summer, I can't wait for the rest of your (abbreviated, less than a full season's worth of episodes have been ordered) season. This is your time!

Moving on from that. (I just realized that college activist guy reminds me of Paul Rudd in Clueless. Cher/Summer joining the fight for chicken's rights. That is totally righteous of you, Travis.)

YES! The cage fighting has arrived! In three years of the OC they have never had anything this ridiculous and for shame. It is about freaking time they busted out this Wolverine-style action. Who are these people, they look like caricatures of WWF wrestlers. Nice stubble, Ryan. Work that shit. Damn, commercial.

Hope you are enjoying the liveblog. I am. Please skip if you must.

Go Caitlin for use of the word schwag. I'm kind of obsessed with her as badass druggie girl. STEPmonster is back! Holy shit! (By the way, way to go with the reference to Demi Moore circa St. Elmo's Fire, Summer, knew you had the angst in you.)

Seriously why were parties not like this when I was in college? Digeridoos and banging on woodblocks? This is the fakest college party I've ever seen.

Yay Ryan with blod and bandages on his hands. This is an excellent way to excise the Marissa demon. Seriously you should have stuck with that Lindsay girl. Yay, red cups - glad that they have made an appearance, that at least is accurate.

BEST LINE EVER: Hey, it's your turn to jam on the didg.

Dude, where did she get these friends? Jesus, Julie Cooper is now officially hilarious. Caitlin is awesome. Way to stick up for Mom. I love that bitchy stare. How is it that Ryan has not died yet? They just aren't showing the end of the fight, that's lame. Come on, that was not cage-fighty enough for me.

"It's not your fault." Most impactful line that actually means nothing ever since Good Will Hunting.

Holy shit, Ryan hit Seth! THAT is cold.

Yay, Summer is back already! Ooh that is awkward, I seriously cannot take the breakup of Seth and Summer. Do not go there.

Nice sweatband Dr. Roberts. And when the hell did Kirsten get that freaking ridiculous car?? Nice vest, Caitlin. And leggings. Of course. Leggings, converse, graphic tee, vest. So Lohan.

Oh Summer, such an activist. And a hiking backpack. Another great quote: "I don't do sarcasm anymore, I'm post-ironic." That's the fun of it all, isn't it - the show still has a sense of humor. Summer is the example of that, at least at the moment. We shall see.

More emo music with Ryan washing his hands. Oh right, this already happened. Way to go with the blurry camera angles and double exposure or whatever that is called. What is this cheap hotel room action? I think I recognize that lamp. Oh Julie, are you siccing Ryan on Volchek. Julie stop making other people do your dirty work. Ryan does not need any more of this shit. Ugh, what is this. I really can't believe Marissa is actually dead. It's kind of weird. Who kills off a major character like that? Also who has polaroids anymore. No one, that's who. Some day I'd like to look back on sad tragic love affairs and find Polaroids underneath my bed, but I won't, and that's just that, now isn't it.

Ryan is looking more Russell Croweish than ever. This bar is like the Nuthouse on heroin, minus Kelly and the fun signs. Summer seems to have come into herself a little bit - I can't figure out if she's got angst or just a little more maturity. Way to go Julie. Take out your rage on your crafts. What?! Are you serious - did Dr. Roberts really have an affair? Oh man. Draaaama is building.

Summer has gray cords much like me. Oh shit is this an intervention? Awesome, that is some classic teen drama action. Ooh, origin story. So deep. I love that. Gotta love the total self-referentialism/nostalgia of this show. This comic looks like Heroes, kind of. Also a lot like Rex Morgan, MD. Can you buy this comic? That would be so fanfic of me.

Gotta love Sandy. He's still my favorite, especially now that he is over this whole real estate mogul phase. How are they still paying for their huge house if Kirsten isn't working (what happened to the matchmaking venture with Julie?) and Sandy is working in a crappily paid job?

Classic: "Just let yourself feel what you need to feel, even if it hurts." So deep, as usual. I love that Summer has a hiking backpack. What is this scene, this looks bad. Come on Summer wtf. Not acceptable behavior for your sweet homebody Cohen. Wise up. Ha. Also she looks so tan. I don't remember Summer being that tan. It's amazing to see how much skinnier she's gotten since the first season. That Heather Mills McCartney line is a little old, you think they could have fixed that. Dammit Summer, behave yourself!

Augh, 1988-2006, that's weird. Kind of got a weird twinge when I saw that. Fuck, of course the second Ryan shapes up and stops cage fighting, he picks up the freaking Volchek revenge thing. What is this scene here I am confused. Also a little disturbed. WHAT?! Ha, all the music was by Keane. That's more One Tree Hill than the OC.


Steve-O on the OC? I could DIE!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thanks Em. The OC is truly unwatchable, But now that you canned it for us, I can get the good shit in a nutshell. Way better than tivo. D