OC Liveblog Episode 8 - The Earth Girls are Easy

Now out of alt-world and back to the real world, we remind ourselves about the whole prostitution ring. Good times.

AND we start with a moment with Taylor and Summer in the bathroom with a pregnancy test. Which I assume was Summer’s. Interesting.

Back in time…. Apparently we’re working with a moving forward episode. Starting forward, moving back, moving forward.

Summer and Taylor are now hanging out with coffee and Taylor worries that giving Ryan lingerie for herself for New Year’s will make him thinks he is a sex starved divorcee. Which she kind of is.

Back to Seth and Ryan, Seth says that no plans for New Year’s is good because having plans means that you are an adult. There is time for that in college. While meanwhile Summer is worrying about something and complaining about Seth never having any plans. This bodes well.

Seth gives Summer an incredibly stupid t-shirt for the holiday and says “It’s funny because it’s not.” Summer’s hormones appear to be getting to her because she tells Seth she is quick of babying him and shoves the box with the unfunny t-shirt back at him.

Kevin Sorbo appears in the episode as someone overhearing the young male slut talk about male prostitution rings. Julie has to cover up for her illegal activities so she struggles to launder money and avoid Kirsten’s suspicions.

Jimmy reappears (or at least is mentioned) because he is hosting a party on his boat. Really will he get the hell into real life now? I liked the alt universe better.

Bullitt shows up again to invite Julie to a party that she is not going to. Bullitt wants hanky-panky and she isn’t having any, because she has to launder money.

Seth tries to strike up a conversation with his dad about the fact that he screwed up new years plans. Romantic holiday plans are not superpowers. Seth tells his dad about the whole “since he isn’t in college yet he doesn’t need to worry about doing fun New Year’s Eve plans” theory. Sandy reminds him to be safe which, given that whole beginning thing with the pregnancy tests, is sort of… A double entendre.

Julie has a rendezvous with the mini-Bullitt who has lost his black prostitution book. Tough break. They decide that they are over the whole thing because it’s getting too shifty. And then, Bullitt shows up at Kevin Sorbo’s house where Sorbo is looking over information about a mysterious woman who is running a data service. Sorbo has the little black book, so he knows what’s up.

Taylor confronts Summer about the pregnancy test because she has put together the pieces. Turns out Summer didn’t want to take birth control pills while she was on her whole anti-everything hippie phase at Brown, so perhaps she made a little oopsie. At least they acknowledge the cause of the situation. She says condoms smell funny, which I suppose is true, kind of.

Taylor is seriously awesome, keeps calling the pregnancy test toothpaste. She really doesn’t let up on these things.

Seth bribes Ryan with sandwiches and Sandy Cohen’s monetary support for the hotel into letting him crash the Vegas roadtrip – a handy way to come up with a plan for New Year’s.

In a little toothpaste mix up, Seth finds the pregnancy test but Taylor takes the fall – hush hush. Taylor and Summer as friends are way more interesting than Marissa and Summer.

Bullitt is totally a ridiculous person. I don’t understand anything he says because I am distracted by the accent. Bullitt and Kaitlin have a discussion where she convinces him to let the whole Julie being weird thing go. And then he bribes her and gives her money for a “dress” a.k.a. pot.

Taylor seems to be wearing a funny pregnancy top which isn’t helping her cause.

Seth quizzes Ryan about the whole pregnancy thing, trying to figure out if Taylor is cheating. “Are you absolutely positive that you haven’t had sex with Taylor yet?”

There is a weird “slutty alien” in the bathroom who seems to be playing some mystery role as like the guardian angel.

Kevin Sorbo appears in Julie’s office and Julie is still wearing the ugliest shirt ever. Bullitt wants to put his accountant (Sorbo!) to work so he shoos Julie off and leaves the accountant with the messed up books.

SHIT! The crazy alien stole the purse and is running off to the car. They are now off on a wild alien chase. Dude, weird shit happens on the way to Vegas. It’s like an alien planet or a nuclear disaster site.

24-style, it’s suddenly become dark. Sweet, they have ended up at a weird alien rave. Does this exist? I’m so confused. Ryan and Seth split up and take the girls away so they can find the purse.

At the party, Julie sees what she has done – set up so many young attractive guys with plastic surgeoned women. Not exactly subtle. And it’s at the party that Bullitt is hosting so she’s kind of screwed. Oh also, Kaitlin meets some Saudi princes at the party. She sure gets shitty plotlines.

Ryan and Taylor get in some bit of a fight because she has a few issues with self esteem. She thinks Ryan thinks she’s a slut.

Seth screws up big time by celebrating (to Summer) the whole idea that he and Summer are not the pregnant ones. Summer bails, and then Seth realizes that he’s an idiot. And gets sort of attacked by a random Atomic County nerd who distracts him from his prize.

Is it just me or did Julie just get propositioned by the accountant guy? Caitlin at least is onto something and follows her mom. But she gets distracted from the real issue and doesn’t do anything about it.

Back at the rave, Ryan and Taylor and Seth and Summer have all been separated. Ryan and Taylor are fighting, and Summer shows up to tell the truth. Then she grabs Ryan’s keys and they run off. Sweet, this apparently takes place near area 51. The unborn baby metaphor, yes, is not so helpful guys. At least you recognize your issues. They notice the alien running off.

They are full of talk about fresh starts in the New Year - Yes, you get a fresh start right in time for the season to get canceled. Good timing.

Ryan and Seth are grabbing the purse from underneath the table where weird alien and her weird hookup buddy are, well, hooking up, when Taylor calls them and they get kind of caught. They run off with the Atomic County fan and his weird alien friends.

Caitlin shows her nice streak again by being nice to Bullitt who has been sort of rejected by Julie. She asks him to dance the two-step with her. Oh Caitlin, thank you for being slightly more than one dimensional. I am a fan. Augh, and then it turns out you are wearing leggings.

Ryan shows up at Taylor’s finally, where she says “If you’re here for sex, there’s like 5 guys ahead of you.” Good to know you have a sense of humor. Then they jump into bed –swearing to do “everything but.” Whatever that means.

And in a random twist, Seth proposes to Summer. I thought I would hate this but it’s actually kind of cute. A little scary, but cute. And then you have to bring me back down to earth with the whole not being pregnant and therefore realizing you were really just swept away by the whole thing. Kinda awkward.

Classic Julie Cooper quote: “I may be a madam, but I’m not a whore.”

Sandy finally realizes that something is wrong… he has been recognizing Kevin Sorbo all night and cannot figure out what the hell is going on – runs back and checks his files – YES IT IS TOTALLY FRANK ATWOOD RYAN’S DAD!!! HOLY SHIIIIIT! DAMN THIS SHOW IS SO GOOD HOW CAN YOU CANCEL IT!!!