The OC Liveblog Episode 9 – My Two Dads

Taylor bursts into Summer’s with a list of awesome new year’s resolutions (lost to the speed at which I type this thing, unfortunately). Halfway through she learns that she’s got wedding planner duty for Summer. But Summer feels a little awkward about all this. She confesses that everything Seth usually says is laced with “irony and contempt” and his sincerity in the whole engagement thing swept her off her feet.

Ryan clarifies shit for Seth, pointing out that if he doesn’t really want to get married he probably shouldn’t have proposed. Very astute. Taylor and Ryan talk shop and realize that neither Seth or summer wants to get married but that the likelihood of them coming to that conclusion mutually without argument is pretty much nil. Right then Summer and Seth come up to ask the blond ones if they want to be the maid of honor and best man and all that. Gotta love this kind of awkwardness.

(Do people really start planning their weddings as soon as they got engaged?)

Seth says he feels good about himself – “a little long term life time relationship” is all he needed.

Sandy confronts Ryan’s dad about him being in Newport and being a liar and a criminal and all that. He doesn’t want to let him talk to Ryan, but Frank wants him to hear him out. He says he’s gotten over all his shit and asks, “Do you ever think the system works sometimes,” Sandy points out, why now? Blah di dah. Julie is rooting for Frank, but probably because he knows that she is a madam.

Sandy’s hair looks kind of weird. Gratuitous shots of beautiful beaches and surfing and all that.

Ryan and Seth try to figure out what to do about Summer. Seth knows her well: “She says she’ll get over it but she means she gets even.” Ryan tells Seth to “smoke her out” which is exactly right.

Caitlin is in school wearing a very cute jumper. Caitlin gives a speech about call of the wild in the voice of a dog, which is you know very cool and rebellious and all that. God, I love that jumper. Finally, we have a real plotline in high school where she spends like 7 hours of every day. It’s about time. She has to study and rewrite her speech with the smart new kid.

Sandy tells Ryan that his dad is here and Ryan takes it, um, not so well. Mostly he is just kind of floored. Sandy says that what is important is whatever Ryan wants, and Ryan doesn’t want to see him. Good choice, but really it’s a moot point. How weird would it be if your dad was in jail? For some reason right now I think of Joey Potter. I feel for you, poor children of the teen drama.

Frank hangs out in his classy hotel room, on whatever money he happens to have gotten since he got out of jail 6 weeks before. So good to know that prison pays well.

Seth tries to “smoke Summer out” by giving her a cookbook, cooking classes and the Torah for conversion. Summer knows exactly what’s going on and is “going Bridezilla on his ass.” Go Summer she really does have guts. Great, Frank Atwood is dying. I could have seen this shit a mile away.

Sandy doesn’t take shit – he does not need someone coming to mess with his family. Kirsten convinces

Summer shows up with a diamond brochure and a bunny for Seth to babysit. Seth brings up writing his own vows, and Summer retorts with some Shel Silverstein and Dr Seuss, which is really quite witty for her.

Back in Newport, Caitlin wants the smart kid to cheat for her. He is in the band, and is awkward. Caitlin is convinced he can cheat for her. But we all know that isn’t going to happen…

Aaand now back at Sandy’s, Kirsten is bribing him with sandwiches. She wants him to let Frank Atwood meet Ryan.

Ryan and Taylor cutify up the mall talking about their issues. Taylor apparently has some daddy issues because her dad is like Luke’s dad only not gay. (Annotation: I have no idea what I mean by that – I think I mean he’s unavailable.)

Summer learns her Hebrew words and tries to cook brisket REAL badly. Julie is helping her but she realizes something is going on. When she realizes Summer is engaged, Julie says “you’re young, but works for me” which is awesome. They realize that Summer is only trying to keep the upper hand in the situation, which is Julie’s kind of dating game – manipulating the opposite sex. After about 5 seconds of trying to pronounce chutzpah they realize they need to work together.

Kirsten has talked to Ryan and has him meet his dad down on a pier followed by coffee, apparently. Next day Ryan tells Seth about how it was just fine. Seth and Summer can’t come to dinner because they are building a hoopa together. “You mean you don’t want to lose TO her.” Seth has Pancakes in his pants. Or perhaps in a pocket around his waist. He calls the Pancakes bunny his son. I love the bunny!

Caitlin thinks she got the smart kid to do her work for her but he tricked her and now she has nothing to say in her presentation. She ends up in front of the class talking about how her life sucks and the more crap you go through the more you want to be alone. Oh Caitlin it’s hard to be you. I mean that.

Taylor is nervous not about Ryan’s dad not liking her because she has never been there for the serious stuff. Just little things like insomnia, him not getting over his ex, thinking she was pregnant, whatever, total child’s play.

Sandy and Kirsten disagree about what’s-his-face showing up to dinner. Sandy doesn’t like him, obvious, and Kirsten has too much of a heart. Because she’s an idiot and feels sorry for another former alcoholic. But naturally Sandy agrees to be nice.

Frank meets Julie at the Newport club because he doesn’t know if he needs to wear a jacket to the Cohens or not. Julie tries to reassure him that he’ll be fine because everyone knows that people can change for the better. This would be heartwarming if I trusted this guy at all!

Summer shows up to Seth’s and suggests they shrink the size of their wedding down to Vegas style. “Come on it’s our honeymoon – go commando!”

At dinner, Ryan’s dad is really awkward trying to share family stories. Kind of nice and friendly but I think he’s a snake. Very strategic, he has a picture of a failed trip to SF. Taylor really is obsessed with Ryan it’s kind of awesome.

Sandy and Ryan talk about how nice the dad is in the kitchen and then Sandy gets a call from the prison doctor. This appears to be some kind of suspicious news – perhaps Nicey McNicerson is not so nice.

Seth and Summer are on their way to Vegas and you could cut that tension with a butter knife. Seth pulls over and says he needs to ask summer’s dad for permission. This is one hell of a game of chicken.

Sandy busts up to party to talk to Frank about the whole faking dying of cancer thing. He is totally going to punch him in the balls. Frank is a liar and Sandy knows it. But Frank also knows that his son didn’t want to see him and he feels like he had to lie. Wow it’s weird to see Kevin Sorbo not as Hercules. Nice little argument here – “this is my house” – “he’s my son” – “not anymore.”

YES! Sandy totally punched him! But that didn’t look so good of a punch. Kevin Sorbo seriously scares the shit out of me right now. He was ready to kill Sandy.

You know what would be awesome – if Caitlin and the black band geek hooked up. I almost feel like this is straight Ricky plus Ryanne Graff. Geeky outcast and badass girl outcast! “She playin’.”

Ryan and his dad hash it out and Ryan says it’s just too soon for him. Understandable, Ryan really does have some crazy parents. Nice “I’m not much of a hugger” comment. Leave it to the OC to put a light moment in a ridiculously dramatic episode.

Seriously this show is repeating songs that came out like 3 years ago. I know because I know them and I haven’t paid so much attention to new music recently due to lack of good downloading. Ryan and Taylor are seriously adorable.

Oh, cute, “My dad is right here.” I seriously love the Ryan-Sandy banter. Julie tells it to Frank straight – you get caught lying about cancer you’re going to get punched. This is a beachside makeout waiting to happen. Nice waiting cab, more money down the drain. Julie says “It’s hard out here for a pimp.” Frank convinces her that she could be financially independent if she continued to run the prostitution ring which is, you know, true, sort of.

And pretty much the inevitability – Julie and Frank Atwood making out next to a cab. Nothing but class.

Family time? Aww, the Cohens watch that Meerkats show on TV. Why? Kirsten says, “Because I wanted to,” that’s kind of like my mom. I love the Cohens.